Can We Move Past Fear?

I know fear. The gut-wrenching, overwhelming instinct to don anything that will act as armor to protect oneself amid real or perceived danger. During my early childhood years, a parental figure wielded dominance designed to control me and my poor eyesight was fodder for bullies, among other tragic and damaging experiences. Yes, I am all too familiar with the heart-racing, all-consuming negative emotion we call fear, but more importantly, I know there is a way to move past it.

After days of taking in the rippled aftermath of the Paris attacks (Beirut, Syria, Egypt, Tunisia and Libya, as well), the itch to share my thoughts begged to be scratched. I sat with my laptop, foregoing my usually strict start-of-the-day routine, and wrote. My motivation was the urge to shed light on what seemed to be missing from Facebook posts showing up in my newsfeed and the conversations I was overhearing, though I was aware that there would be misinterpretations. No matter how plainly I attempted to convey my thoughts, the challenge to let compassion and humanity guide my friends, instead of the mistrust and hate spawned by fear was lost on some.

My original post:

https://www.facebook.com/tschamberland/posts/10153667180050365

As I read through my newsfeed and overhear the conversations of others recently, I'm saddened at the blatant fear mongering that has reared it's ugly head since the attacks in Paris. I'm not blind, or ignorant to the fact that fear and hate have always lingered in the shadows, but the reaction - the venomous expression of those damaging emotions has caused me to ponder how far we have digressed as humans.

Our actions should never be driven by the negative tit-for-tat mentality that both fear and hate fuel. Compassion and support should surpass any fear a person holds. Whether we agree with someone's religion, politics, heritage, race or choice of lifestyle, we are all inhabiting this spinning rock, and at the root of it all, just trying to LIVE. I don't need to understand, or even agree with someone else's words, actions or life to be able to support them in their time of need.

Need and vulnerability visit each and every one of us at some point in our finite time walking the earth. To be shunned, chastised or vehemently denied comfort or assistance because people do not understand or agree is inhumane. While I am not religious, 'Do unto others' has always been my guiding principle. I don't have to see the world through the same eyes as my neighbor, nor do I need to agree with everything about them to recognize when they are hurting, or in need. By the same token, my sympathy, assistance and support are not hindered by such self-centered, and short-sighted hang-ups.

In the wake of tragedy, there will always be negative shouts of divisiveness. It is my belief that when fear motivates reaction, the most vulnerable of all are those who precipitate hate through judgement, defamation and retaliatory actions. They are, by far, in the most need of understanding and support. Being limited and chained to a closed mind and half-functioning heart because of fear (and make no mistake it all traces back to FEAR), is to live a half-life (thank you J.K. Rowling). There is little to no hope of experiencing a full existence without the ability to be magnanimous.

When we put aside our view of the world around us, and can be present for those in need, instead of keeping score or enacting vengeance, there will be growth and progress. It shouldn't matter if France objected to the United States' actions post 911, and that fact shouldn't cause the denial of empathy and support. The overall political arena should not dictate the human experience. In every country, there are negative factions, but this doesn't mean the entire population is undeserving of support in their time of need.

Far too much limitation in life is being thrust upon people who have no idea that it is possible to exist beyond whatever boundaries they have been taught bind them. That kind act, show of support, helping hand, and willingness to see past our own fear can be the catalyst that brings change. Change for the person in need, as well as for the person offering assistance.

Let go of your fear, and reconnect with your soul. We are all living this life for the first time, often stumbling through it, making mistakes and in need of help. What a difference it makes when we don't have to question IF someone will extend their hand to lift us up - we don't question our worthiness and value in the world in those moments where negativity is most opportunistic. And how incredible it is to give of ourselves without concern or conditions.

"Be the change you want to see in the world." - Gandhi

Without fail, and mere seconds after posting, the feedback began. By the second comment, my point that fear is at the root of hate and instant distrust was essentially proven. With so much unrest in the world, so many uncertainties based on propaganda and highly publicized incidents and events, it is difficult for a vast number of people to differentiate between being magnanimous and kind, and being naive or unprepared and vulnerable. 

The need to strike back, close our borders to refugees, and the outright declaration that all Muslims are terrorists instantaneously took their place below that post, leading to some interesting back and forth debates. While I am not opposed to war, nor am I against standing up for oneself, those are completely different topics from what I was trying to convey. My meaning, my point was sadly lost on several people. At the most basic human level, everyone benefits from the support and empathy of others. Well, maybe not everyone, as there are those who have let negativity bleed into every cell of their being. These people are, sadly, all too often beyond the benefits of humane interactions. While I believe that there are factions throughout the world that will always be a threat to the rest of Earth's populous, they do not represent each and every person from the culture they were born out of.

Being prepared, alert and informed are undeniably essential today. That does not mean that in order to preserve our well-being and way of life that we should rely on vague and unfair profiling to guide us. Fear mongering has many avenues, and before we were focused on the radical/extremist Muslim factions, it was illegal immigrants, before that African-Americans, before that Japanese, and before that the Jews and Native Americans. Lies and misleading fragments of information regarding each and every one of these has led to hate, crime and terror in some form. 

When something is beyond our comprehension or experience, the immediate reaction is that it is wrong. Otherwise, we are back to not understanding, and not knowing just sparks fear deep within us. Why do we hate? Especially when we cannot possibly have been wronged by an entire population of any given culture?

People of a particular race, religion or cultural background naturally gravitate together, because - let's face it, commonality and familiarity are comfortable things. Segregating ourselves within these lines, we lose the ability to appreciate the unknowns associated with other races, religions and cultures. Rather than stay objective and seek information on our own (without the immediate red alert of fear) many choose to let what they don't know create opinions that promote discord. We go about life in these little circles that lack diversity, boasting about how unique and different we are, expecting to be heralded for breaking the proverbial mold. Yet when we encounter others who truly are unique and more different than anyone in the world we have surrounded ourselves with, we shun, ridicule and foster widespread hate, because the only thing we may have in common is being human, and suddenly that just isn't enough. Differences in this case are wholly undesirable, and undesirable must be wrong.

In chain reaction-like fashion, it has become common place that many people's beliefs about other cultures are spawned from the acts of a few. There are discussions in groups of like-minded individuals that seems to have taken place of actual research and education, leading to the assertion that if some are evil, the entire culture must be as well. Rumors and accounts of strange practices, mixed with over-publicized incidents pave the way for hate. Too many are basing their views of the world-at-large on bits and pieces of information, and unsubstantiated intel, rather than rationally seeking answers to what we don't know or understand on our own. For certain, there are actual instances of crimes and wrong doings perpetrated globally on a daily basis, but the number of guilty is in daunting contrast to the rest of the people in that same population. There is a pervasive laziness that exists when it comes to learning, cheating us out of real education. I believe that fear is truly at the root of all of it. When a person chooses to skirt through life, borrowing half-truths, and meshing together random tidbits of the world around them, and the people who inhabit it, it is lazy. There is a difference between not having the resources to gain knowledge, and completely bypassing it by choice. When it becomes the accepted norm to spout about topics where the foundation of opinion is comprised of unreliable snippets, and cultural opinions paraded as facts, there is little question to how hate and fear create panic and unrest. 

The effort and dedication to truly informing ourselves cannot be avoided without consequence. People form biased views for a variety of reasons. They fear 'missing out' on something fun or enjoyable if they invest time in research or learning, and opt to adopt conjecture as their basis, and reasoning because it requires less work. Others are simply too sheltered to realize the beliefs that have been passed down through generations are outdated, have no real basis, and overwhelmingly false. I've seen evidence of both in my hometown. An influx of Somali refugees disturbed the balance of the predominantly white community I grew up in, and the reactions were heavily fear-based. Stories of flagrant abuse of public welfare, chickens roosting in kitchen cabinets, and the overall sense that these people were somehow taking handouts and opportunities away from the rest of the city's more-deserving-because-it's-their-birthright indigent residents led to a very public clashing of cultures. While it has been more than a decade since the forced diversification of Lewiston, Maine, the stereotypical view of the Somali population lingers. There may have been isolated incidences that have an element of fact, but the overall hatred of these people that was spread was based in fear and exaggerations. 

It is well-known that Muslims follow the Quran, and that the average person outside of the Muslim community knows little of it's contents.  Muslim nations have given birth to several terrorist organizations who often quote the Quran as their guide/manifesto (I'd say America has birthed a fair amount of terrorists as well - the KKK, Timothy McVeigh, the Una bomber...I could go on). The general consensus among the fear mongering is that all Muslims are terrorists, or at the very least should be treated as thought they are. This is paramount to me saying that because I was raped by two men who happened to be black, that all rapists are black. This would be not only be incorrect, it is a dangerous way to view the world and it's potential hazards. Luckily, I have done a fair amount of research on rape and those who commit it. While it is widely believed that rape happens at night, in bad areas, and by predominantly black males, by educating myself with facts instead of letting fear form my opinions, I know that this is not true. I also know that there is no definitive way to assess who could potentially rape me simply because of their skin color, financial demographic or cultural affiliation. Sure, there are almost certainly rapists that fit some, if not all of those criteria, but that isn't reliable enough information to cause public alarm. 

It is ignorant to both deny assistance (or insist on its denial) and justify that end with the 'bad apple' analogy. At the most basic level of being human, empathy knows no prejudice. It does not matter that France disagreed with the U.S. in 2001 about waging war on terrorism. They suffered at the hands of madmen - something we as Americans have experienced, and regardless of differing politics and world views, the French deserve empathy. As do those in all nations rocked by terror; including, if not most especially those countries that ISIS extremists other terrorist call home. Extending empathy and support can be done in a vast number of ways; and doesn't need to compromise the consoler's sense of safety. My original point was that politics, religion and culture (except only to consider respectful shows of support) should not be used to place conditions on empathy given to those in need. We risk far more than the potential vulnerability to being attacked by refusing to put aside our differences and reach out to help; we risk losing our humanity. In the wake of all this terror, our world cannot afford that kind of loss.